How can I accept that up to now, I have had a terrible personality that needs changing?

Declaring yourself terrible is too easy.

Writing yourself off like that is an excuse . . . a way of hiding behind ideals of perfection.

Your personality is a sequence of ever-evolving values which must each face and grow through specific hindrances and limitations in order to exist more in the world (through you).

You could stare forever at your distance from any ideal self—any prediction about how living perfectly by all your values might look—but all that does is give you a story you can get used to telling yourself about why and how to avoid seeing and taking your own obvious next steps forward from exactly where you are right now.

What do you really want?

If you want to improve, then own everything about what and where you currently are. Do so consistently over time, and you can pull your perspective back from every lofty impossible distance to focus instead on what you already know (deep down) must come next.

And when you find a way that works for you to make that process of self-ownership public, you replace shame with progress, and eventually remove all excuses not to make better decisions in the moment so you can always get better and better at living as your best self.

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